Tuesday, October 21, 2008

shifting geres

I have never seen the movie “Autumn in New York.” But, for a while now, whenever someone mentions how it’s starting to get chilly outside or when Gossip Girl (as she did last night) says things like “There is nothing quite like autumn in New York!” I can’t help but envision Richard Gere and Winona Ryder walking amongst the orange and yellow leaves as some schmaltzy ballad plays in the background.

Here’s what I can tell you about this movie (because I am sure you love to hear about movies that came out eight years ago from people who haven’t actually seen them):
1) Richard Gere, as ever, plays someone who has never found meaningful love. He’s a wily playboy. He has gray hair.
2) But then he meets Winona Ryder. She’s cute! She’s spunky! She has a short haircut! What else could possibly happen but him falling in love with her so intensely, right? (Basically, WR was the Natalie Portman in “Garden State” before Natalie Portman in “Garden State.”)
3) Uh-oh. It turns out Winona’s got a terminal illness, y’all. She’s going to die. Just when she was about to totally re-energize Richard Gere’s life and give him a new purpose for living, too. What will he do now? Buy a sports car? Start dating Tara Reid? Dye his gray hair?

No joke, the tagline for this movie is “He fell in love for the first time… she fell in love forever.” Get it? She’s in love with him forever because she is going to die and will be loving him from heaven for the rest of time.

This is what I think about whenever some work acquaintance fake-shivers on the elevator and turns to me and says “Well I guess summer's over, huh?”

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't watch the movie. It is painful to sit through. She makes these terribly ugly hats and we find out Richard Gere also slept with her mother. I'm sorry people in the elevator make comments like that. Some people should come with muzzles or shock collars.

*~Dani~* said...

Wow - I totally forgot about the whole sleeping with her mother thing. And the hats. Those were terrible hats.

Guess you aren't missing out on much, huh?

Fake shivers are the worst. So is fake conversation.