Tuesday, February 17, 2009

i hate almonds

It's easy to hate something when you've never tried it.

I'm always doing it. I'm like "I hate almonds" when guess what I have never tried them. I used to think it was a pride thing, something about how twentysomethings are always so worried about the pride and the image and how they would rather just say they hate something than admit they haven't tried it. (Note how I try to make my personal idiosyncrasies indicative of some greater "twentysomethings" trend to ease my anxieties...)

This weekend I was at this bar and the group of people I was with decided we were going to play darts. I was annoyed because I have always hated darts, hated the idea of darts, especially hated the people I envision as being the kind of people who would play darts on a Saturday night at the bar. You know, the girls with the jeans that are tight in all the wrong places and the guys who haven't shaved in a few days and who high five a lot. Not to mention the game itself is semi-violent and mostly-pointless = what a great combination! This is all to say I had never tried darts before which is why I had developed all these reasons why it was the worst thing ever invented. (This is how we work. I could write similar paragraphs about beer pong or the Lord of the Rings books or kids I went to college with but never spoke to.)

Of course, I played the darts - I didn't have a choice - and the people I was with taught me how to keep score and nagged me to try harder when I "wasn't trying." And it was fine. I got a bullseye so that was cool.

You think I am going to say that it wasn't so bad and there's going to be one of those morals, where I tell you in some roundabout way that I learned that we shouldn't knock things until we've tried them. But no. I'm not going to say that. Because playing darts wasn't that great. And because what I actually learned is that our instincts about what we're going to like are usually pretty good, that if I'm going to be annoying and come up with some theory about pride, a better one would be that if us twentysomethings go into something thinking that we are going to hate it, chances are we probably will... and that I'm never trying almonds.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

How have you never tried almonds? They're in everything! I can see avoiding them if you've got an allergy, but that would require you to have tried them, so clearly you don't have an allergy. Which makes me wonder - how have you never tried almonds????

Anonymous said...

Almonds are lame. You aren't missing anything.

I hate the Lord of the Rings books. I've never read them, but they are extremely hateable nonetheless.

valera said...

The proud mouse respectfully wonders: what is it about instinct that makes it right?

Back in the Habit said...

Almonds are awesome and you would like them because a) you like peanut butter, like me; b) you like avocados, like me; and c) you felt mediocre about darts, like me. Therefore, by the transient property of friendship, you would like almonds, like me.

I will break your vow. It is my mission.

Anonymous said...

I hate almonds too! They have this weird after taste in about 50% of tehm that tastes almost chemical. However I do love those glace cherries which are marinaded in almond extract....

Anonymous said...

I've tried almonds. And they suck, I hate them to. I hate when companies advertise almonds in their snacks as if they were some kind of delicacy. They're not. They taste like wood. Actually, wood tastes better than almonds. I've tasted wood to.

Hate on brother, hate on.

PS: Super cool to allow anonymous comments. I hate signing up for shit.